My wife's favorite channel is probably either The Food Network or TLC. Therefore I see a lot of both in our house. Lately TLC has become especially fixated on new reality shows that depict the life of what many would call America's "oddest" families. They've got little people as a family, a couple, and even as chocolatiers! They've got quintuplets, sextuplets, and so many multiple-birth families I can't remember all their names. And they love their cake shows. One of TLC's shows is one of our favorites because of the strong commitment to Christian values the family has even when derided by most of America (19 Kids and Counting... aka "The Duggers"). Undoubtedly though, TLC's primary reason for giving them a reality show is they polarize the audience... some love them for the reasons we do, but most disagree with the way they do family life and think they're just plain weird.
In that same spirit TLC has now introduced the show Sister Wives, a show about a man with multiple wives. TLC is clearly keeping with their theme and portraying abnormal "families" that will polarize the viewing audience.
If you watch TLC you've seen about a million promo commercials for this show. The man states with a sheepish, innocent smile on his face that he, "fell in love... then fell in love again... then fell in love again." This small quote breaks my heart and makes me sick every time I hear it... for multiple reasons.
First, the man is astoundingly selfish and immature. Immature men who don't understand marriage or God often joke about going out and getting another wife. This man actually followed through. In his selfish desire for love and sex with multiple women he has placed his own desires above those of God and of the women he is with. Even the commercial hints at the conflicting emotions these women have to deal with. TLC tries to show these women happy together but the truth is obvious: they are hurting deeply inside and are having to suppress a lot of confusion and self-doubt. This is one of the most disgusting displays of selfish, egotistical behavior taken to its logical conclusion that I've ever seen on reality TV.
Second, when the man says with a smile on his face that he kept falling in love, he is telling the world that anything done in the name of love is acceptable because love is the one overriding principle that justifies all actions. The logic of this is absolutely foolish and you see it all the time today. Dating couples claim that having sex outside of marriage is fine "because we love each other." An adulterous husband claims that cheating was justified because he "fell in love" with another woman and "fell out of love" with his wife. Homosexuality is justified continually on the basis of "love."
Third, and perhaps most dangerous, is the jaded concept of "love" this man is portraying to the world. 1 John 3:16 says, "This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us." 1 Corinthians 13:5 says, "love is not self-seeking." This man's idea of love means doing whatever it takes to meet his own emotional and physical needs. True love desires the glory of God and the good of others. True love gives another person what they truly need and does not justify itself by convincing them to go along with our selfish desires. This man has done just that. He has manipulated these women into believing that being one of many wives is OK and even fun. If he truly loved them, even if they wished to be in a polygamous relationship with him, he would deny them that "satisfaction."
True love gives people what they need even when they don't know what they need themselves. True love genuinely seeks the well-being of the other person. Truly loving parents often deny a child's request for unhealthy foods. Truly loving husbands have devotional time with their families when the family initially doesn't want to. Truly loving families have interventions to rescue their loved ones from the clutches of drugs or alcohol. Truly loving wives turn the channel when a sexually suggestive commercial comes on in front of their husbands. Love is not meeting every surface desire of another person... it's giving them what they truly need and therefore transforming their desires to conform with God's. Fundamentally we have to remember... not every natural desire we have is good.
I wish I could make a charge to enough people to refuse to watch this show thereby forcing it to be cancelled. I know that won't happen though. Instead I challenge you to pray against polygamous relationships. They are not marriage. They are not loving. They are not glorifying to God.
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