2 Cents

Prayer can also be hilarious. Ever heard somebody pray like this? Ever prayed like this yourself?

"God I want to pray for Grandpa Joe. He's got the flu (just in case you didn't know). He was checked into the hospital the other day (just in case you missed that) and he's in room 325A (if you decide to visit you'll know where to go). Please heal him."

"God, I thank you God, for all your goodness God, and for your grace God. God you are so good God and we are sinners God in need of your mercy God. God please forgive us God for all the times God that we fail you God. And God give us the strength God to remain holy God and to honor your word God so that God you will be glorified God and people God will see you God in this world God."

"Lord we just really wanna come before you right now and just give you praise for just your blessings. God we just feel so thankful for all you give to us and we just really wanna show you our gratitude. God you just rain down so many blessings and you just keep giving and giving. Just help us to see your blessings and just continue to bless us in just all the ways you have been... and... just... amen."

"Father... [long awkward pause] I feel like you're telling me to pray for Jane in our group... [even longer awkward pause] and to let everyone know that she's been struggling with [embarrassing sin that no one in the group knew about]. We pray that you'd heal her God (and we thank you that no one knows what we're struggling with)."

*** As fast as physically possible *** "Bless us, O Lord, and these thy gifts we are about to receive from thy bounty through Christ our Lord. Amen."

"Father God thou hast richly blessed your children and for this we give you thanks. Bless this food to the nourishment of our bodies and make us better servants for thee. Forgive us our trespasses and help us to walk in the light everlasting for thy glorious grace, Amen." ** Proceed to return to normal 21st century English speech **

"Father God we pray for our country and the horrible state our depraved and sinful government and President has brought us to. We pray that you would cleanse us of all the evil our government has allowed to seep into our great nation and repay them for what their deeds deserve. God bless America! Amen!" ***Awkward silence***

And finally... a favorite from my grandparent's church in rural Kentucky...

** With a thick country accent ** "Dear Lord thank you for this day and everything in it. Be with us as we depart from this place and bring us back again at the appointed time. GuideGuardAndDirectUs (ONE WORD!) until we meet again. Amen."

First of all let me say this is not meant maliciously or to insult anyone. I think it's important that we laugh at ourselves from time to time. WE ALL probably have things we say or do while praying that make other people laugh so don't be so quick to judge the prayers of others. First of all, be thankful they have prayer habits at all. Many people never pray. So let's not take ourselves to seriously.

Second it's important that we analyze how we pray and why we pray the way we do. Our goal is to be as God-honoring and God-centered as possible in our prayers. Our goal is to pray like Jesus. Our goal is to seek God and commune with him. If you're praying mindlessly and without meaning something probably needs to change. Don't preach when you pray... don't tell God things he already knows... and don't use prayer as an excuse to gossip about others. Glorify God when you pray and use the prayers of Jesus and the other biblical men and women of the Bible as examples.

Finally... I leave you with this. CRACKS ME UP!