Archive for October 2010

If you don't live in Kentucky much of this will be confusing to you... however I'm sure you can see the same principles working out wherever you're from.

This upcoming Nov. 2 is mid-term elections day. Many analysts and politicians are calling this the most crucial mid-term elections in years. The question on my mind is not who should I vote for but... should I even vote?

Typically my opinion on this matter is strong. In previous situations (especially Presidential elections) I've believed it our responsibility as citizens within a democracy to educate ourselves on the candidates and participate in the election process by voting. In fact one of the most God-honoring ways to support or even overthrow governments is to vote.

However during this election year I'm seriously considering not voting at all. Here's why...

First, I honestly cannot tell which candidate is telling the truth. If I'm to believe all the commercials I see I'm going to conclude that Rand Paul hates Jesus and old people. Jack Conway meanwhile wants to take all your money from you and spend it on himself. Ben Chandler actually hates the state of Kentucky. And Andy Barr's pants are on fire because he's been lying so much he's been arrested for it. Now I'm not naive enough to believe all the negative campaign ads against each of these men, but at the same time I also can't tell who is a genuine, responsible, caring candidate and who is a devil worshipper. That's how bad it's been.

Second, I've heard next to nothing from these candidates about what they stand for or what they're seeking to do if elected to office. The only things I have heard have been why I shouldn't vote for the other guy. This is one of the main reasons I might not vote at all. Each candidate has almost convinced me not to vote for the other guy!

Third I can't blindly vote for a party without knowing the man or woman I'm endorsing - as many voters can and do. I think it's an irresponsible act to cast your vote for someone simply because they stand under a certain political umbrella when you don't know the person at all. I think we can all agree that just because someone is a Republican doesn't mean they're not egotistical, money-hungry, selfish, prideful, or simply an awful person. There are many supporters of the Republican party that I've known over the years that I would never want in office running our country or state.

As always I challenge you to make your own decision in this matter. I'm simply stating my opinions in light of what I've seen this election season. I'm sure many of you now want to send me a lengthy comment or message on why I should vote for your favorite candidate that you've been so passionate about for the past few months. I won't discourage you... but I will challenge you to ask yourself... have I given as much time, energy, attention, and thought to my relationship with God as I have to my political stance/endorsement? Do I get as fired up about false theology as I do about those who disagree with my political philosophy?

When I was single and unmarried with much less to worry about I had the opportunity to delve a lot more into researching candidates and getting to know them. But now I'm understanding that a large portion of America has so many other things in their lives that take precedence over taking time out to research a candidate (and rightfully so!) like walking daily with God, raising a family, providing for that family, caring for sick relatives, navigating through the pressures of losing jobs, etc. In many of these cases the only knowledge these men and women will get is from the commercials I've been describing above. Hardly an objective way to make a responsible voting decision.

Again if you disagree with everything I've said, that's fine... politics is often a hot-button issue. The real question here is how can I best glorify God with the decision I make (to vote or not to vote, and if the former, for which candidate)? The answer might be different for you than it is for me.

In any case, I'll be thanking God when these horrible TV ads are over and done with.

When someone's off to take a test, interview for a job, speak in public, or go on their first date our token response is always.... "GOOD LUCK."

But if we truly understand the way the world has been created and is ruled by God we would never say "good luck" at all.

You might be thinking to yourself that this is extremely trivial and insignificant in the large scope of actions we need to correct to become more godly. However God-centered living means we seek to glorify God with every single word that comes out of our mouths. I remember being in undergraduate college at UK and one of my friends called me out on this. I was so surprised that he'd question such a seemingly small statement I had made. After all, everyone else says it right?

However there were two things I didn't realize at that time:

First, it's hardly consistent, holy, or virtuous to let God pervade every area of your life except for the small, insignificant parts. God wants every inch of you turned over to him and renewed so that he can show his glory forth in you. God is not a God that stops just short of perfection because it doesn't matter in the end. He completes every job in its entirety - to the last, minute details.

Second, every word that comes out of your mouth communicates something you believe about God - even the seemingly insignificant ones. Therefore we should seek to make every single word that comes out of our mouths God-centered.

So why is it not God-centered to tell someone "good luck"? Sounds like a nice thing to say doesn't it?

When we say "good luck" we're first of all communicating that there is such a thing as luck at all, when in actuality the principle can be found nowhere in Scripture. God is the creator and rule of the world. Nothing happens outside of either his causative or permissive will. That means that every single thing that happens is either caused or allowed by God. Nothing slips under his radar.

Also when we say "good luck" we're communicating that some outside force can influence what you're about to do, when in actuality God has set the world up in such a way that (most of the time) you reap what you sow. This means if you study hard for your test you'll generally do well. If you prepare well for your interview you will generally do well. *** Dating might be a different story here (LOL). But when we say "good luck" what we really are communicating is that there is no rhyme or reason to why people succeed in their endeavors... it's just up to some cosmic force called "luck" that is apparently pretty random.

Finally principle of good or bad luck sounds extremely close to the philosophy of karma found in Eastern religions such as Hinduism and Buddhism. Karma is the idea that your deeds will revisit you. So as a general principle if you do good, good things will happen to you (good karma) and if you do bad things, bad will happen to you (bad karma). Therefore karma takes out the role of God as our ruler and replaces it with the self. It has no explanation for the fact that sometimes bad things happen to good people and good things happen to bad people. Jesus suffered and died on the cross. Bad karma perhaps? Not in the least. It was the will of God.

So next time, instead of telling someone "good luck," it would be more God-centered to tell them, "God will be with you," or even, "I hope you do well."

If you're a preacher, teacher, campus minister, lay-leader in your church, or simply a growing Christian seeking to reach people for Christ....

One of the best ways to improve your communication skills is to teach children and/or teenagers.

This past weekend I had a great opportunity to teach the 7th-12th grade class at the church I grew up in. Typically I'm teaching college students so it wasn't easy trying to communicate clearly to young men and women that were almost half the age of some college students. I had to drastically re-think my approach.

One of the ways doing this helps your communication to adults and others is it forces you to become more concise and more clear. If you're not clear and concise to a group of teens you will likely sound like the teacher from Charlie Brown to them. Don't dumb it down... just make sure it's very clear and not muddled with too much elaboration or theological language. If you can explain something clearly to children you can explain it to an adult.

Second, it gives you great practice at trying to put yourself in the shoes of your audience. The closer your audience is in age to YOU the less you think about how they are receiving your message. But this isn't necessarily a good thing. In fact it can be detrimental to your effectiveness as a communicator. When you speak to teens or children the age gap forces you to critique your own message and to put yourself in their shoes. As Christians we should constantly be aware of this. How does the non-Christian view our approach to them in sharing the gospel? How does communicating with a post-modern audience effect the desires you appeal to? How do you become all things to all men so that you might save some? (1 Cor. 9:22)

Finally, it reminds us that despite all our interests in the deep, theological debates typically seen in seminary circles and on college campuses, the essential truths of God and the gospel will always be simple enough for a child to understand. Let us never lose sight of this. Jesus said, "Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these." (Luke 18:16)

Take some time today and try to remember where you were and how old you were when you first heard John 3:16. Remember (before you had heard it a million times) how that verse touched your heart and blew your mind? Do you remember the first time you read Luke 9:23-24? Or how about Acts 2:37-41?

I challenge each of you... if you are a Christian... man, woman, minster, teacher, lay-leader, mother, father...

Take every opportunity you get to teach young children or teens. Don't tell yourself you are somehow above that ministry. Don't be tempted to believe that teaching children is less important than teaching adults. If adult ministry is where your heart lies, teaching children and/or teens will help you to grow.

This weekend is opening weekend for the new Clint Eastwood film Hereafter starring Matt Damon. Damon plays George, a blue-collar American who has the "gift" of being able to connect with the souls of the dead.

Personally I'm very surprised we don't see more movies that touch on this topic. As men and women created by God we are destined to live in eternity in one of two places. Therefore it's not at all surprising that even non-Christians are fascinated with death and life-after death. Case in point: about every year or so someone will have what they consider an out of body experience after being pronounced dead for a few minutes or hours and then, after being resuscitated, will turn around and write a book about it (like Don Piper's 90 Minutes in Heaven). Subsequently the books sell like hot cakes - even among non-Christians.

While I'm certain there have been others, the last movie I saw that focused on the after-life was The Sixth Sense. One beautiful scene in the movie comes at the very end when Haley Joel Osment's character is in the car with his mom and begins to speak with her about his deceased grandmother (her mother) and what she wants to tell her mother that she never got to during life. Admittedly the scene brings me to tears because it pulls on the innate desire in each one of us for eternity.

However it's extremely important that we realize that Satan knows we all have this God-given desire for eternity. Not only that, but he seeks to use it against us and through it to turn us away from God. This is what happens each time some well-meaning but naive person turns to a psychic, communicator with the dead, spiritist, medium, or the like. Many such persons are simply con-artists. However some are most definitely under demonic influence which they themselves have allowed to come over their lives and Satan produces fascinating things through them as a way to distract men and women from the One True God. Scripture is clear... all such activity is a blatant rebellion against God's law for both those practicing and those seeking to contact dead loved ones.

With that said, let me also say that Clint Eastwood has quickly become my favorite director in Hollywood. While I don't know if Hereafter will be as good as some of his other films I would heartily recommend the following if you haven't seen them...

Mystic River
Grand Torino
Million Dollar Baby
Unforgiven

Prayer is truly a gift from God. When it comes to building close fellowship with other believers nothing compares to praying out loud with them. There's just something about listening to a brother or sister in Christ pray that unites your soul to theirs.

Prayer can also be hilarious. Ever heard somebody pray like this? Ever prayed like this yourself?

"God I want to pray for Grandpa Joe. He's got the flu (just in case you didn't know). He was checked into the hospital the other day (just in case you missed that) and he's in room 325A (if you decide to visit you'll know where to go). Please heal him."

"God, I thank you God, for all your goodness God, and for your grace God. God you are so good God and we are sinners God in need of your mercy God. God please forgive us God for all the times God that we fail you God. And God give us the strength God to remain holy God and to honor your word God so that God you will be glorified God and people God will see you God in this world God."

"Lord we just really wanna come before you right now and just give you praise for just your blessings. God we just feel so thankful for all you give to us and we just really wanna show you our gratitude. God you just rain down so many blessings and you just keep giving and giving. Just help us to see your blessings and just continue to bless us in just all the ways you have been... and... just... amen."

"Father... [long awkward pause] I feel like you're telling me to pray for Jane in our group... [even longer awkward pause] and to let everyone know that she's been struggling with [embarrassing sin that no one in the group knew about]. We pray that you'd heal her God (and we thank you that no one knows what we're struggling with)."

*** As fast as physically possible *** "Bless us, O Lord, and these thy gifts we are about to receive from thy bounty through Christ our Lord. Amen."

"Father God thou hast richly blessed your children and for this we give you thanks. Bless this food to the nourishment of our bodies and make us better servants for thee. Forgive us our trespasses and help us to walk in the light everlasting for thy glorious grace, Amen." ** Proceed to return to normal 21st century English speech **

"Father God we pray for our country and the horrible state our depraved and sinful government and President has brought us to. We pray that you would cleanse us of all the evil our government has allowed to seep into our great nation and repay them for what their deeds deserve. God bless America! Amen!" ***Awkward silence***

And finally... a favorite from my grandparent's church in rural Kentucky...

** With a thick country accent ** "Dear Lord thank you for this day and everything in it. Be with us as we depart from this place and bring us back again at the appointed time. GuideGuardAndDirectUs (ONE WORD!) until we meet again. Amen."

First of all let me say this is not meant maliciously or to insult anyone. I think it's important that we laugh at ourselves from time to time. WE ALL probably have things we say or do while praying that make other people laugh so don't be so quick to judge the prayers of others. First of all, be thankful they have prayer habits at all. Many people never pray. So let's not take ourselves to seriously.

Second it's important that we analyze how we pray and why we pray the way we do. Our goal is to be as God-honoring and God-centered as possible in our prayers. Our goal is to pray like Jesus. Our goal is to seek God and commune with him. If you're praying mindlessly and without meaning something probably needs to change. Don't preach when you pray... don't tell God things he already knows... and don't use prayer as an excuse to gossip about others. Glorify God when you pray and use the prayers of Jesus and the other biblical men and women of the Bible as examples.

Finally... I leave you with this. CRACKS ME UP!

Most Christians take a strong stance on the Calvinism and Arminianism debate. *** BTW if these terms are unfamiliar to you Calvinism basically claims that God has pre-determined every event in history and Arminianism claims man has free-will.*** In fact I think most of us would be lying if we said our ears did not perk up every time the topic rears its head in conversation.

But while we take sides and take them boldly with strong belief, we're not always consistent in the way we act - myself included. I often see, hear about, and read about many Arminians acting like Calvinists and many Calvinists acting like Arminians. Here's a few ways this plays out.

Arminians Acting Like Calvinists

Plenty of Arminians frequently use simple sayings like, "Whatever happens happens," or, "it was meant to be." I'm not saying Arminians who say these things don't believe in free-will, but it is interesting to think about why they say them. If so many things were just meant to be then do we really have free will? If whatever happens will happen then what's the point of free will?

What about when Arminians pray? It's not uncommon to hear prayers for God to open up the hearts of unbelievers in Arminian churches or small groups. But what about the free-will choice to believe?

Or consider when Arminians try to ease someone's suffering by saying, "It was God's will." Was that car-accident or that sin that affected others so heavily really God's will? I'm playing both sides here, but feel free to leave your comments one way or the other.

Calvinists Acting Like Arminians

Ever seen a Calvinist share the gospel? They push pretty hard for a choice from the unbeliever. I can just hear those wheels turning... so let it out in the comments section. Let me reiterate that I'm trying to spark thought and discussion here, not claiming I've got the answers.

Ever hear a Calvinist complain that they don't understand why or how an Arminian can believe as they do?? Never mind that according to Calvinism God had already predestined that Arminian to believe that way. Think about it.

Ever hear a Calvinist apologize? Should they really be sorry for God working out his perfect pre-determined plan? I mean it's not like their little mistake slipped through the cracks of God's eternal decree, is it?

My point is this: most of us are not as staunch in our stance as we think. Are some people more consistent than others? Absolutely. I'm just saying these things are pretty common for both camps. I know where I stand on which one I think is biblical. I bet you do to. If you don't I encourage you to search the Scriptures with a humble and submissive heart and mind to find out. Wrestling with Calvinism/Arminianism debate by reading the Word, prayer, and talking with more mature Christians has helped me grow immensely in my faith... and it will for you as well.

Don't shy away from these discussions simply because you feel they're not essential to your faith. Many Christians don't care about these things until one of their close friends disagrees with them. It's important to search the truth of the Bible to know the correct views of God and to be able to refute the false ones. Just remember that while one might be wrong (or both to a degree) neither side is going to hell. Jesus brings us all under one family.

My wife's favorite channel is probably either The Food Network or TLC. Therefore I see a lot of both in our house. Lately TLC has become especially fixated on new reality shows that depict the life of what many would call America's "oddest" families. They've got little people as a family, a couple, and even as chocolatiers! They've got quintuplets, sextuplets, and so many multiple-birth families I can't remember all their names. And they love their cake shows.

One of TLC's shows is one of our favorites because of the strong commitment to Christian values the family has even when derided by most of America (19 Kids and Counting... aka "The Duggers"). Undoubtedly though, TLC's primary reason for giving them a reality show is they polarize the audience... some love them for the reasons we do, but most disagree with the way they do family life and think they're just plain weird.

In that same spirit TLC has now introduced the show Sister Wives, a show about a man with multiple wives. TLC is clearly keeping with their theme and portraying abnormal "families" that will polarize the viewing audience.

If you watch TLC you've seen about a million promo commercials for this show. The man states with a sheepish, innocent smile on his face that he, "fell in love... then fell in love again... then fell in love again." This small quote breaks my heart and makes me sick every time I hear it... for multiple reasons.

First, the man is astoundingly selfish and immature. Immature men who don't understand marriage or God often joke about going out and getting another wife. This man actually followed through. In his selfish desire for love and sex with multiple women he has placed his own desires above those of God and of the women he is with. Even the commercial hints at the conflicting emotions these women have to deal with. TLC tries to show these women happy together but the truth is obvious: they are hurting deeply inside and are having to suppress a lot of confusion and self-doubt. This is one of the most disgusting displays of selfish, egotistical behavior taken to its logical conclusion that I've ever seen on reality TV.

Second, when the man says with a smile on his face that he kept falling in love, he is telling the world that anything done in the name of love is acceptable because love is the one overriding principle that justifies all actions. The logic of this is absolutely foolish and you see it all the time today. Dating couples claim that having sex outside of marriage is fine "because we love each other." An adulterous husband claims that cheating was justified because he "fell in love" with another woman and "fell out of love" with his wife. Homosexuality is justified continually on the basis of "love."

Third, and perhaps most dangerous, is the jaded concept of "love" this man is portraying to the world. 1 John 3:16 says, "This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us." 1 Corinthians 13:5 says, "love is not self-seeking." This man's idea of love means doing whatever it takes to meet his own emotional and physical needs. True love desires the glory of God and the good of others. True love gives another person what they truly need and does not justify itself by convincing them to go along with our selfish desires. This man has done just that. He has manipulated these women into believing that being one of many wives is OK and even fun. If he truly loved them, even if they wished to be in a polygamous relationship with him, he would deny them that "satisfaction."

True love gives people what they need even when they don't know what they need themselves. True love genuinely seeks the well-being of the other person. Truly loving parents often deny a child's request for unhealthy foods. Truly loving husbands have devotional time with their families when the family initially doesn't want to. Truly loving families have interventions to rescue their loved ones from the clutches of drugs or alcohol. Truly loving wives turn the channel when a sexually suggestive commercial comes on in front of their husbands. Love is not meeting every surface desire of another person... it's giving them what they truly need and therefore transforming their desires to conform with God's. Fundamentally we have to remember... not every natural desire we have is good.

I wish I could make a charge to enough people to refuse to watch this show thereby forcing it to be cancelled. I know that won't happen though. Instead I challenge you to pray against polygamous relationships. They are not marriage. They are not loving. They are not glorifying to God.

2 Corinthians 8:1-4

And now, brothers, we want you to know about the grace that God has given the Macedonian churches. Out of the most severe trial, their overflowing joy and their extreme poverty welled up in rich generosity. For I testify that they gave as much as they were able, and even beyond their ability. Entirely on their own, they urgently pleaded with us for the privilege of sharing in this service to the saints.

Do you ever read passages like this and wonder, “Why am I not like the Macedonian Christians?” Do you find that you often have to discipline yourself to serve and give rather than having it naturally overflow out of the joy of your heart? Hopefully this post will help you bridge the gap between your service now and that exhibited in the New Testament.

I think most everyone can agree that the New Testament calls us to serve. The commands are numerous and clear – 1 Peter 4:10, Mark 10:43-45, 1 John 3:16, John 13:15-17, Luke 17:10. But even deeper than this, we are urged to do so with joy, to love serving.

If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames,but have not love, I gain nothing. - 1 Corinthians 13:3

He has showed you, O man, what is good. And what does the Lord require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God. - Micah 6:8

So how do we go from serving as a duty and an obligation (when many times we don’t naturally want to) to serving as an overflow of joy and desiring deeply to meet the needs of others?

First, we must fall in love with God. If we do this we will love others as he loves them. And we know how much he loves them by the cross (Rom. 5:8, John 3:16, 1 John 3:16). How do we fall in love with God? By spending time with him. God is the most lovely and good thing in the universe. When we spend time with him we cannot help but be drawn to him because of this. It’s inevitable. Regular, consistent, deep, undistracted, time in the word and in prayer is the best way to accomplish this. Also spending quality time with those that you can clearly tell are already in love with God is extremely helpful.

Second, we must actually make ourselves serve when we don’t want to. At first this may sound counter-productive – to know that God doesn’t want us to serve under compulsion or with a dutiful obligation but then to do so anyway. The point is that God wants you to get to a point where service is natural and not forced. But you cannot get there overnight. And one of the best ways to get there is to simply start serving. By meeting the needs of others you will experience a natural high and God-glorifying joy that you will want to duplicate again and again. But sometimes you can’t experience that high until you’ve actually forced yourself to get out and serve. Once you do you start a never-ending cycle of service producing joy motivating you to more service producing more joy.

Finally we must realize that God does not judge service based upon its effectiveness but on the heart behind it. Even the most menial or mundane task can honor the Lord in an extraordinary way. Consider the woman who gave two fractions of a penny in Mark 12:41-44. Consider that Jesus said that even something as small as a cold cup of water given in his name would be rewarded in Matthew 10:42. Even the most glorified example of service (apart from the cross) in Scripture was a menial task normally done by a house slave but in this instance done by the God of the Universe (John 13). When we realize this we will no longer talk ourselves out of service because we feel it’s not that important in the big picture.

The person handing out bulletins at church or cleaning the toilets can have more heavenly reward than the preacher depending on their heart.

PRINCIPLE #4 - Practice Courtship

I know what you're thinking... Courtship!? This is 2010... not 1910!

In one sense you've got a good point. Courtship has been largely ignored, forgotten, and put aside for more modern ways of dating. But I'm a firm believer that if you're honest with yourself about the health of your future marriage, courtship is more biblical and more effective in producing lasting marriage than is modern-day dating. But before we get into the advantages it has over today's dating style let's define what it actually involves.

First, courtship involves not only the man courting the woman but also courting her entire family - especially her Father. It must be stressed that this is not always possible. Sometimes the parents aren't Christians or don't care who their daughter dates. Sometimes the parents are in a different state or country so it makes this a little harder. But whenever possible a man should build relationships with the parents and siblings of the woman he is dating. Biblically it is the family's job to protect a young girl from dating the wrong type of guys (i.e. those only interested in sexual activity, those who aren't Christians, those who are immature, violent men, etc.). In situations where a woman's parents or family are not Christians and she is, I would advise you men to court her friends because now this is their job (see Song of Songs).

Furthermore it is primarily the responsibility of the girl's Father to do so. Biblically the Father is the head and leader of the home and outside influences (whether theological or relational) should go through the Father in some way. Seeking the approval of the Father is a sign of respect toward not only him, but also his daughter, and the entire family. I would challenge all you men to ask a Father's permission before even dating his daughter. Some will think you're a little weird but I guarantee they will be pleased that you respect them enough to do so.

Second, courtship means a public relationship. In traditional courtship the couple is never unsupervised in some way shape or form by the family of either the woman or man. This sounds overly protective, but as a Christian you can never be overly concerned with keeping your dating relationship pure and free from sexual temptation. In modern-day situations where supervision is not always the case the relationship should remain public. This does not mean having the parents looking over your shoulders at all times. But it does mean no time alone in a room whatsoever. The goal is to honor God's design for dating and marriage by keeping yourselves away from each other sexually until marriage. I've known many couples who have not kissed each other until the kiss at the alter of their marriage ceremony. I think that's a beautiful picture of obedience to God.

In deciding whether courtship is right for you or not let me offer this statistic. The divorce rate in America now exceeds 50%. The divorce rate in India is an astounding.... 1%. That's right... 1. Why? I think it mostly stems from their cultural view of dating and marriage. Most marriages in India are arranged marriages. Individualized Americans hate those two words but the truth is they often work... and work well with loving couples staying married and faithful for life. Think about it for a second. Instead of an emotionally-charged, inexperienced 20-30 year old choosing their spouse for life you have 50-60 year olds who understand both life and marriage better choosing for you. Instead of dating practices that involve pre-marital sex, co-habitation, and very little family involvement, you have traditional courtship. And instead of accepting the possibility of divorce even before getting married, you have a culture that sees marriage as a lifetime commitment, no questions asked. It's not hard to see why America's divorce rate is so much higher than India's.

Am I saying you need to have your parents arrange your marriage? Not at all. What I am saying is that it would be beneficial for you - if you desire life-long, monogamous marriage - to consider the advantages of courtship. The saying is very true that when you get married you don't just marry your wife, you marry your in-laws as well. Marriage is best done when you love your in-laws and they love you. Courtship promotes this. Furthermore courtship provides a safe and accountable way to keep your relationship sexually pure and to save sex for the proper God-appointed time. As opposed as you may be, isn't following God in EVERYTHING worth it??

Principle #3 - Date a Christian

Principle #1 is placed first for a reason. The first thing you need to be concerned with before you start dating is giving your life over to Jesus Christ and living for God's glory. Consequently it would logically follow that the person you should be looking for to date needs to have done the same.

Again we must not apply this principle as a one-size-fits-all, always-applicable rule for dating. God can, and does, bring couples to Christ who were together long before each knew the Lord. However this is the exception, not the rule, and it should never be your goal to be with someone who could pull you away from your most important relationship - the one with God. More often than not the unbeliever brings the believer down, not the other way around.

In 1 Corinthians 6:14 Paul writes, "Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness." In context this statement should be taken to apply to relationships in general and fellowship. The primary meaning of this passage is not dating or marriage as many would have you believe. However a very proper application of the passage is dating. If the passage applies to fellowship among believers (such as church small groups) how much more should it apply to the most intimate human relationship (marriage)! And as we said in pt. 2, the point of dating should always be marriage.

Again, after reading this some of you may be convicted that you need to end your current dating relationship. I believe if that person is not a Christian there is a strong reason to believe that the conviction you're feeling is from the Holy Spirit and you should act on it immediately. If you are not dating, set your standards high. Don't take the principle and settle for any attractive person who assents to the fact that Jesus died on the cross. Even demons believe in God (James 2:19). Pursue a man/woman who is clearly and obviously denying themselves and taking up their cross daily to follow Christ (Luke 9:23-24).

to be continued...

** Sorry I've been away from posting for a few days. My wife and I have some important decisions to make in life right now. Stress is high... a baby is coming... any prayers would be greatly appreciated **

In light of this I thought I'd post about a lesson God has been pleased to re-teach me lately.

Often when we have an important decision in front of us or a pivotal time in life we pray for God to open certain doors and make certain things happen. There's nothing wrong with this at all. In fact it is good and biblical. God delights in seeing his children ask him for things they desire (Matt. 7:7-11). I started doing this about a month ago regarding a few specific things.

Since then God has most certainly answered my prayers in various ways. A few things were expected... most were completely not. And this is where he taught me the lesson.

When we pray and ask for certain things God desires to give them to us as long as they are in his will. However he does not always give them to us in the way that we might expect or even desire. So the question is... how do you respond when God gives you what you asked for but not in the way you expected or desired?

My initial response was to resist it. God had indeed given me what I'd asked for (Glory to God! He answers prayer!) But it most certainly was not in the ways I expected. And it was even in a way that initially I did not want. My initial response of resistance was sinful and God made that abundantly clear to me.

Once convicted about my improper response I had two choices. (1) I could repent and ask God to change my heart to line up with his will or (2) I could suppress the truth that I was in sin and convince myself why it wasn't truly the will of God. I want to stress this second possible choice because it's what we are all tempted to do... and many end up doing. We don't like God's will (even though he desires our joy) so we sinfully and rebelliously talk ourselves into all the reasons it's probably not his will. "Psalm 37:4 says God will give me the desires of my heart and I don't desire this," we say. "My spiritual gifts don't line up well with that," we say. We cloak our sinful excuses in fake holiness and twisted Scripture.

At the end of the day, by the grace of God, I chose to repent and ask God to change my heart. Through multiple avenues he did and I now delight greatly in what I originally resisted. God is truly great.

I leave you with 1 John 5:14-15 and the words of Thomas Campbell...

"This is the confidence we have in approaching God: that if we ask anything according to his will he hears us. And if we know that he hears us, whatever we ask, we know that we have what we asked of him." - 1 John 5:14-15

"What!? Shall we pray for a thing and not strive to obtain it!?" - Thomas Campbell from The Declaration & Address of the Christian Association of Washington

We’re coming up on one of my favorite seasons of the year. No it’s not because the leaves turn colors and it gets cool and all the fall stuff comes out. No it’s not because there’s a few fun holidays right in a row. No it’s not even because of football season. It’s the start of the Oscar movie season! For a lot of people the summer time is when the best movies come out but for me it’s the end of the year. In a sort of cheap effort to get their films recognized by the Academy, the companies seeking awards intentionally release their films as close to the cut-off date as possible so they will leave a good impression in the minds of the Academy members who vote on the awards (I was quite happy last year when this didn’t work and The Hurt Locker won – which was fantastic btw).

In light of the exciting (at least for me) upcoming movie season, here are the top ten films I’m looking forward to seeing.

1. True Grit – A Cohen Brother’s adaptation of the book of the same title. It’s not intended to be a remake of the John Wayne film, although John Wayne did win an Oscar for his role and taking over his part is none other than Jeff Bridges!

2. Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows pt. 1 – Can’t wait. These movies are becoming extremely well acted are starting to show off some of the best cinematography in all of Hollywood. Would never have thought that from the first two films.

3. The King’s Speech – A period piece (my wife’s favs) with Colin Firth playing stuttering King George VI, Helena Bonham Carter, and Geoffrey Rush. Should be great. Hope it gets released in Lexington!

4. Due Date – A comedy starring Robert Downey Jr. and Zach Galifinakis… need I say more??

5. The Social Network – I saw a review that called this the “movie of the decade”. That might be a little strong but it’s the same director who did Se7en, Fight Club, and Benjamin Button so it should be solid. Lots of up and coming actors here.

6. The Fighter – I love Boston movies, boxing movies, Mark Wahlberg, and Christian Bale… so I’m thinking I’ll like this.

7. Conviction – Hillary Swank is one of the top 3 best actresses alive in my opinion and Sam Rockwell is quickly becoming a seriously talented actor himself. This could be my favorite cast ensemble of the year.

8. Hereafter – Matt Damon is almost always a shoe-in (almost) and Clint Eastwood is, in my opinion, the best director in Hollywood today.

9. 127 Hours – James Franco plays the dude who cut off his own arm to survive in the wilderness. This could be really good or really terrible.

10. Casino Jack – Kevin Spacey, one of my favorite actors, is in kind of a slump with the films he’s chosen recently. Hopefully he will get some well-deserved recognition for playing this low-dealing business tycoon. I’ve seen very little on this one however so this is a bit of a shot in the dark.

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